Changes

So finally, something is happening "down there"! I didn't want to post about my cervical dilation on facebook so I am putting on my blog! By now, I'm sure you all are okay with too much information :) I am dilated to 1 cm (after having a tightly closed cervix for the past four weeks) and I'm effaced around 30%! Yea. I prayed this morning for some encouragment that something would be changing and it was. I do think I'm having contractions......I feel like this is confirmed by the fact that I'm dilated a little. The contractions aren't very regular or too painful but sometimes they do stop me in my tracks. I lost a pound this past week but I think it was a scale error because the last week it said I had gained 4 pounds is 1 week. I've been eating junk food some but not that MUCH! I truly think I have gained about 23 pounds so far give or take a pound. My blood pressure is still really good. My back pain hasn't been quite as bad over the past 48 hours. Olivia hasn't been quite as active and when I told Dr. R. that, she said "I bet you are getting ready to go into labor." I don't know if baby's being less active is a sign of impending labor or not. I can't remember how much Carter was moving at this point. She is still kicking and squirming but she's probably running out of room and is not moving near as much as she was. But all is well, her heartbeat is still nice and strong. So, time will tell.

I asked Dr. R. about the castor oil and she didn't seem too excited about that option. She said if it got past my due date, we would discuss other options for helping me go into labor (besides pitocin!). Either way, since my mom is coming on the 5th and leaving the 13th, if I haven't gone into labor by the 10th, I will most likely be induced. I think Dr. R was okay with that plan b/c she understands I don't have any family here and it would be so much easier if I could have Olivia while mom was here. So again, either way, if I haven't gone into labor on my own, she will be here in TWO WEEKS! I started feeling a littel nervous about that today! But I'm really just excited and ready to meet her :)

Brotherly Love

38 weeks

Yeah, I'm feeling every bit of 38 weeks too. I definitely think she has dropped because I can overall breathe a little easier, I can eat more without feeling like I'm going to throw up, and I am having some awful back pain. The back pain seems to come when I am most tired (when I'm about to lay down with Carter for nap and at night). It's only on the right side but I have to contort my body into some strange positions just to get comfortable. My feet have been getting swollen too when I stand up for too long. And this moring, I woke up and my right eye is swollen. I told Theo my whole right side of my body is out of whack right now. Carter and I stayed home all day yesterday because I am just too tired. I'm going to attempt to take him out today so we both don't get cabin fever but we'll see. Right now, laying on the couch all day sounds like a better idea.

I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. I am hoping I am having some cervical changes by now. I think I'm having a few contractions, but honestly I can't tell. I never really experience "early labor" with Carter. It was like once my water broke, all my contractions were equally strong and painful. There was no gradual progressions from what I can remember. I'm hoping this time will be a litle different but right now, I just want to have her! More women than not that I have talked to recently have told me how much they did not enjoy being pregnant so I'm trying not to feel mommy guilt about feeling the same way. Anyway, other than that, not much else is going on. I'm pretty much prepared for her to come home but I don't have any wipes or disposable diapers right now. We are using cloth but I may hold off on that for the first couple of weeks when I know I'll be out of my mind. I guess that's why I don't have any pampers. With Carter, I had a closet full of diapers before he ever came home and man we went through those things fast! I'm hoping Theo will install the carseat this week just in case. I'm so "whatever" this time around. And it's not that I'm not excited or want to be prepared, I'm just not near as OCD about it all this time. I guess that's good since I don't have the energy to be obsessive right now. I'll try and post tomorrow after my appointment.

She's So Beautiful!

What a joyful day this has been. We had an ultrasound of Olivia this morning...just so my new OB can take a look at things. The tech estimates that right now she weighs around six pounds. So I guess she will weigh very close to what Carter weighed (6 pounds and 7 ounces). I thought for sure she was bigger or at least longer! Everything looks great and we even got some 4D pictures of her sweet precious face. We have never had a 4D ultrasound before and it was truly amazing. It was such a blessing because our last ultrasound tech did not give us any good pictures although Olivia was doing all kinds of cute things (like holding her feet up by her mouth or pictures of her adorable profile) When I saw her, I just teared up. I told Theo that every moment of pain or discomfort or uncertainty is so worth it to know that in a few days, I'll be holding my daughter. Even as I type this, I am just crying because I am overwhelmed by how blessed we are. After our last ultrasound being overshadowed by something being wrong with her, today was such a joy. I am so thankful to God for everything He has given us. I am going to cherish these last three weeks I have with her growing inside of me but am so excited about getting to meet her face to face. In other good news, when the ultrasound tech asked us what her name was, Theo said "Olivia"! I was so excited. I guess that means he has finally agreed to her name....with still three weeks to spare. :) I can't decide if she looks like Carter or not. Without a 4D picture of him, it's hard to compare. Carter thinks she's cute too. When we got home and I put her pictures of her on the refrigerator, he said "Awwww, mommy she's so cute!" I hope he still thinks that in three weeks. He has been so sweet lately. Even this morning, he laid his head on my belly and said "I wanna love on baby sister". I'm praying it will last. :)

The Second Time Around

I have had this idea for a post floating in my head for a while now. I'm just surprised at myself how differently things have been this time. This is not a post about how much more uncomfortable I am so don't worry :) It's just being an "experienced" mom now has made this pregnancy and how I have responded to it very different. For starters.....

The first time, I read every single word of What to Expect When You're Expecting and any other pregnancy related book I could get my hands on. This time, I have read maybe two chapters out of all my books and figure I know everything there is to know.

The first time, I took 3 pregnancy tests just to make sure the test remained positive. This time, I only took one test....I just knew I was pregnant based on the way I felt.

The first time, Theo and I enjoyed taking lamaze classes. This time, we are much too busy chasing Carter around to hire a sitter weekly to attend birthing classes.

The first time, I was so excited about registering for baby things and constantdly updated my registry based on new things I thought I would need. This time, when my mom suggested registering so my family would know what to get me, I declined the offer thinking that it was going to be too much work carrying Carter around Baby Depot!

The first time, I had beautiful maternity pictures made and had them proudly displayed in our home. This time, although I wanted to have maternity photos made, I ran out of time and figured baby girl would understand. Besides, my belly is just not quite the same :)

The first time, I obsessed over the way I wanted my labor and delivery experiecne to be (i.e. not being induced, not having a c-section, etc). This time, induction at this point sounds GREAT and I'm learning God's timing and ways are perfect and not stress out about it too much.

The first time, I weighed myself constantly because I didn't want to gain too much weight. This time, I don't care and only check my weight at my doctor's appointments.

The first time, I was embarrassed to bare my pregnant belly on the beach while in Florida for fear of what people think. This time, I thought to heck with it....I'm not spending money on a maternity bathing suit so people will just have to deal with it.

The first time, I had Carter's room set up long before his due date. This time, although I would like to have Olivia's room all done, right now her crib is still in Carter's room and her bedding is laying on top of the pack and play.

The first time, I couldn't really relax at home with Carter because I was constantly worrying about keeping up with grad school. This time, I will not be worrying about school and will cherish every moment (well, most of them at least) being a stay at home mom to my two kids.

The first time, I fell in love with my baby as soon as I knew I was pregnant. This time, I did too and can't wait to meet her. God is so good and I'm blessed beyond measure.

36 weeks

I had my routine 36 week appointment this morning. My group B strep cultures came back negative. Yeah! That just means I won't have to have antibiotics at the time of delivery (unless something else pops up). I have gained about 21 pounds so far although I feel more like I've gained 81 pounds. I had received a letter from our insurance about being approved for all these different tests. So I asked Dr. R if she was planning on ordering any of them. One was a fetal echo....I thought maybe she wanted one since the baby had a echogenic intracardiac focus of the heart on her 20 week ultrasound (fancy word for bright spot on the heart that showed up on the ultrasound). She said she didn't think that was necessary since the quad screen came back normal. But she said she wouldn't mind seeing the baby (I'm assuming since she had not ultrasounded me before). So we will have an ultrasound and routine doctor's appointment next Tuesday. I'm excited about getting the see baby girl again! Our last ultrasound was so overshadowed by the fact that something could be wrong that I didn't get to enjoy it as much. I'm most curious to see how big she is. I feel like she is going to be bigger than Carter for sure.

I can not wait for her to be here. I won't ramble on and on about how truly uncomfortable I am......again. But I am ready to not be pregnant. I am ready to have her, hold her, nurse her, dress her in all of her little girly girl clothes. I am thankful that the end result of the pregnancy is going to be a beautiful baby girl but I will admit.....I haven't enjoyed being pregnant as much as I did the first time. Only because of how ughhhh I feel. Please don't get me wrong...it's TOTALLY worth it and there are thousands of women who will never have the chance to experience this. I AM grateful for the miracle of life God has given me. But this is my blog/journal and I'm just being honest. We still plan on having a third baby but at this point...maybe not quite as soon as I had originally planned.

So I'll post the results of my ultrasound next week. I can't believe in less than one month, she'll be here. I really don't want to be induced since I wasn't with Carter so if I get desparate enough...I may try the castor oil again. :) Maybe that's not what caused my water to break, but maybe it was. I'll be willing to try it again to avoid being induced. But if I have to be induced....I will. I really need to have her while my mom is here otherwise we won't have anyone to keep Carter. Here is me at 36 weeks:

35 Weeks

So it's been a little while since I made a post on this blog but I have been a little busy :). I am 35 weeks now and feeling about 45 weeks. I don't know if the altitude is making it hard for me to breathe or if it's because I look like I swallowed a watermelon. I have been surprised by how physically uncomfortable I am this time. Everything hurts. I mean everything....places that didn't hurt until after Carter was born already hurt. When my mom was here she got me a gift certificate for a massage and it was fabulous! I could get one everyday for the next five weeks if I could afford it.

I met my new OB last week. She is great but when I walked into the office, I felt like I was at LSU. And maybe that means I'm a snob but I have always gone to "private" clinics before and this was a huge shock for me. But since I'm so close to the end and didn't know where else to go, I decided to stay. I'm glad I did because Dr. R is going to be great. And as long as she takes good care of me and our baby, that is really all that matters. I go back tomorrow for my group B strep cultures. I'll be going on a weekly basis from here on out. The office is almost a half hour away from our houses and the hospital is even farther than that which is a little bit of a pain but oh well.

Yesterday I did some serious nesting after my parents left. It was like therapy for me. Her room is still not set up b/c we don't have furniture for Carter yet so he's still using the crib. We set up the pack and play, washed all her bedding, hung up all her clothes, gathered all of her adorable cloth diapers, washed the covers to the boucy chair, swing, carseat, and boppy. Wow, I can't believe we are about to start all over again! I'm trying not to focus on the sleepless nights, postpartum discomforts, sore, leaking boobs, nursing around the clock, diaper changes every one to two hours, possibly a jealous big brother, and the hormonal wreck I will be (even more so than now which is scary!). I know she is so worth it and we will fall into a routine just like I did with Carter. This time will be easier in some ways because I won't have the stress of grad school to deal with, but harder in other ways with taking care of Carter and baby sister and not having family close by. But I trust God and know he had baby girl picked out for us since the beginning of time. And I'm still thinking about baby #3 so as long as I haven't given up on that plan, I'm in good shape. Now six weeks from now, I may be ready to say "Two kids is enough" but I feel in my heart we are supposed to have at least three. Anyway, now I'm just rambling.....I'll try and post tomorrow after my OB appointment if anything eventful happens.